Feedback I Gave, 4/4

Jiayuan

So far so good. I cannot really understand the message of your audio project. Maybe at the beginning you could state what your topic is. Also, since this is a rough draft, I think it is okay that you have a few speaking errors here and there because those can be edited later. I also suggest that you include some sort of music or sound effects in the background to make the piece more interactive. That would really enhance your project. You could also split up your sentences by putting silence in between them. Since the project is supposed to be a few minutes long, you could add more facts about your topic or include music to make the piece longer.

Sarah

Awesome! Your sound quality is amazing. I like how you opened your piece with buzzing. It really draws the audience in. At the beginning, I think you could shorten the amount of time you let the buzzing play without your voice. Also, I think you could duck more of the buzzing and music in the background so the audience will be able to hear your voice more clearly. There is somewhat of a harsh transition between the buzzing and the music, so you could think about a way to smooth that out a bit. I think you do really well on getting the purpose of your project across and providing the audience with what to do next.  I like how you mentioned things about what is already out there to help the bees. You could also say exactly how to get involved in these organizations, such as calling or emailing someone. Great job!

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